back from acts 29(x29) church camp! and u might be wondering why acts 29 and u would try to find that book, haha it isnt there. acts ends at chapter 28. thus, the concept of x29 is that it is our own chapter! writtened and lived out by ourselves. yup.

i have to say that the two days where my mom and sis werent at home wasnt an easy one. as in, stuff happened in the family. and i recall praying till 3am the night before church camp. well yeah.

out of the 3 camp objectives i set for myself, i guess God more or less help me met all 3 of them. of which the first was really starting to bother me, but by the grace of God the whole message on the first day of camp was targeted at that directly. reasons for living a normal Christian life. i recall having to answer one of my sajc friends i met at bishan mrt the day before camp too, when he asked me where i was going and all. i told him i had some church rehearsal thingy, and then he posed the question that had confronted me all too many times, "hmm.. how come your church has so much commitments?" as in i didnt want to throw out a cliche any longer like, "oh its because i want to serve God." and stuff. sure all those things are true, but do we really convince not just our heads, but our hearts with that? are we really convicted of why we serve, or rather lead a normal christian life?

and i love how shirley puts it across that the bible has an entirely different definition of a normal Christian life.

"Then he called the crowd to him along with his disciples and said: "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me." - Mark 8:34

that's the 3 qualifications that Jesus mentioned to live a Christian life. whoever said that just going to church and cellgroup once a week would be the norm for a Christian life? ah i duno bout you, but it spoke depts for me.

yup. i know at least for me i came to this camp with lots of mixed feelings. i told God that im not going to step out of this camp and be called into whatever ministry just because i am told to, or just because that's where the church has placed me or what nots. it's not that i aint being submissive or obedient, i want to serve God for who He truly is, with the sole reason that He is worthy from the depts of my heart, and not just riding off the leader's or someone else's fire for God as the source of motivation. God deserves so much more than me being good-spirited, God deserves my entire being, and that includes my own passion and conviction, all of it. God is not looking for good people, God is looking for right people!

and then there were reservations, reservations on the dreams that i had for myself in God, at least for next coming months. i remember jontay asking me if i felt disappointed after all that has happened over the past 3 years i have been in this jc ministry. well obviously i do, if i dont there has to be some issues with me man lol. to be honest i dont see where God is preparing me for for the past three years yet. but somewhere somehow lah alright.

yup had a real long talk with jon my sheep. ah jon i dont know if u would ever read this(he's in tekong now btw), but do remember what i told you! ah i can't stress it enough, how important it is for God to be that constant in our lives. yup not just as part of our lives, but the center of our whole lives. even the closest of friends may falter, and even like what pastor simon eng said, sometimes what we believe in may even come into contradiction with what is happening around our lives, even in church. and how our faith in God shouldnt be based on theological knowledge alone, but on experiencing God Himself.

ah and some other stuff i shant talk about here. above all, im just so grateful that im a child of God!

yup and we're gonna do pioneering work next year into sajc. which means i would have to enter the school lots of times again and most probably be hanging ard potong pasir area. God, this is the revival generation yeah!


"Anything that cools my love for Christ is the world." - John Wesley.