okay im back from Esprit de Corps camp. yeah learnt quite alot. decided on quite a lot of stuff. initially i set 3 camp objectives for myself, but God did not only fulfil those 3, He did so much more than that; so much more i tell you.
the past 4 days and 3 nights would be one i would never forget. yeah like every church camp there is bound to be tears. haha yeah. gonna cut short on my post okay coz got stuff to do later on. the theme of this camp was to 'Build the dream team.' to build the team for God's work. we learnt about biblical unity and the causes and benefits of disunity and unity respectively. on the first altar call night, pastor Shirley kinda like told us as we took the Holy Communian, to think of a promise and a covernant that we would decide on and give to the team we were in, (our cg/ dmm/schools/etc.) and i hung dear to the covernant each and everyone of us in the cg gave. i vowed to run and finish the race with all of you people in the cg, and i mean it. i said i would give my all to this group to see that we would have God's will be done, and i tell you, i meant it with all my heart. that time was really very heartwarming and comforting, like it really felt like we were giving our lives as one for the calling for God. ah God bless you all.
i got to know many others in our cg better and even got to know matthias cousin, Kayson who went along. i would dare say that the church, our cg shares this overwhelming unity that i feel that im
more than a part of them, its sort of feeling like, i
am them. ay its not easy to explain lah. haha i guess there was this night when my sheep kaiwen, martin, kayson and i got together and we really had a real good time. singing oldies from MLTR to Trademark, to so many others i cant remember the names. so kinda shared with them about the song 'Amazing Grace'. about why the writer wrote that song, and how much it meant to me.
okay the second day i learnt quite abit. Pastor Jeff came down to share God's words with us too.
" "Don't be afraid," the prophet answered. "Those who are with us are more than those who are with them." And Elisha prayed, "O LORD, open his eyes so he may see." Then the LORD opened the servant's eyes, and he looked and saw the hills full of horses and chariots of fire all around Elisha. As the enemy came down toward him, Elisha prayed to the LORD, "Strike these people with blindness." So he struck them with blindness, as Elisha had asked."
- 2 Kings 6:16-18
that was the part that struck me the most about the preaching. and also when pastor Jeff asked us to read the Great Commission again. Matthew 28:16-20. Jesus reclaimed all authorty from the devil, and gave all authority on heaven and on earth to us! ("Therefore, go and..") Only Christians who share Christ with the authority of God, are able to bring and reconnect people with God, not by education, not by money, etc. yup you know what does that make us? Spiritually speaking, we are the most powerful people on the face of the earth. if we don't do it, no one else would, no one else could.
okay i guess many were touched by the second night already. haha yeah. Gideon(our District Leader) kinda called me over to his room on the second night to sleep over at his dorm, and shared with me some stuff i wont tell ya. haha. all i can say is definitely, next year would be a year of growth, both in quality and quantity.
third day. haha third day was very spiritually draining and refreshing. haha i duno how to explain lah. okay i guess its much more spiritually refreshing. you'll see why. today we celebrated our Y-Hope 8th Anniversary Youth Service. so we could like go and fetch visitors into NUS to our campsite for the service. yeah it also replaces our saturday service. so i went to fetch my contact, who thankfully agreed to come. haha honestly, if i called u and asked u to come into NUS for a youth anniversary service and if you're a non-believer, would u bother to even think of coming? so i went with Tse Sheng and Kaiwen to pick up the contact. so we kinda sat at Macs and kinda used the time to explain and clear their doubts bout ghost, demons and all other kinds of spiritual stuff. haha i think the night before the other dorm were like telling such stories and that left alot of doubts in their heads! haha ay its okay lah. at least they asked and not live in doubts, dont let anything hinder your relationship with God!
so met up with my contact, and brought him back to NUS for the anniversary. its a real awesome time lah the anniversary, where we looked back at the church youth history. yup to be honest i was also expecting like a timeline from where we moved from which building to which building, and stuff like that. but i guess pastor shirley was like spiritually wise to see that what they needed to show us was not such stuff! instead they showed us people, how the youth services was like in the past, shared with us the problems that the church faced in the past, not the economical problems, not the venue problems, but the problems within and among the people and stuff along that line. after all, the church is not about the building am i right? its about the people.
okay so we were given this piece of paper, which we were gonna write to God. it's about 2 main things. firstly, Thanksgiving, and to count our blessings. how much God has changed us. i realised that every life testimony itself is a miracle by God. then the second section was about what we want to be in Christ 2 yrs from now. so i wrote and wrote. yeah could tell that everyone was writing with that sense of gratefulness. we sealed the letters in our own addressed envelopes and gave them back to the church. two years from now, we are gonna get the letters back by mail, and hopefully really look back and see where we were in the past, and hopefully and better, achieve the objective we set for ourselves.
so then we worshipped. and i tell you i glanced at my contact, he was almost in tears. wah i really could feel God moving in him. so shirley asked, shirley challenged the non-believers who were there to take the first step of faith. to take the first step to be reunited with God. so she asked them to respond, and on the count of 3 those who wanted to experience a relationship with God to raise their hand. and guess what!!?? no, he didnt raise his hand..
okay i guess what im gonna share here would really and hopefully testify about God's amazing plan for all of us. at the end of the service, i was like kinda wanted to talk to my contact abit, then he grabbed my hand, and told me, "can we go to your dorm?" haha okay i know it sounds abit gay but be gone with all that rubbish in your head! then he also like told JunLiang beside him, "i'm sorry." okay honestly as two coreteam members we had no idea wads going on, at least on the surface. i duno man, there was this really strong sense of expectation that he was gonna have God in his life so when he told me that he wanted to talk to me in my dorm there was not really a surprise.
okay so we walked to my dorm. wah i was really like praying to God for the gift of wisdom and knowledge. "let my words be wise please!!" i didnt know wad to expect, really and totally. and could see that JunLiang looked kinda worried too. haha so i signaled him back to his dorm and that i didnt really need his help. not that im super spiritual or wadeva, it was just that i could tell that my contact wanted to like another one to one conversation.
so in my dorm, by God's grace i managed to open his hearts. i shared with him why we are doing all this, and once again, challenged him. and i tell you the next few seconds was really a blur. i challenged him and really told God, "God ah, i can only do this much. u better do the rest well okay, im getting quite sick of this already.!" haha okay lah something about there. so i told him, my contact, "how bout i challenge you to take this step of faith, to trust God for once, He longs to fellowship with you, as a child." and then i told him "but no one is forcing you, if u need more time surely u can go ahead, i can wait." okay i was wondering whether God could wait.
so he said, with tears and puffy eyes, "Yes." AHH!!! no you see, i said two separate statements. so his 'yes' i had no complete idea which statement he was refering to. whether he wants to accept Christ into his life, or he wants more time. haha okay if there is such a verse as "and all the angels broke out in hysteric laughter" in the bible, that would be it! haha. so i said something like, "eh.. yes to?" haha alright lah. YES TO GOD! haha i tell you i felt really overjoyed. so i lead him in to praying the sinner's praying in my dorm. haha yes. in my dorm. i tell you i was kinda nervous okay. like normal prayers is one person lead right. this must like pray then ask him to repeat. and there's like 3 main parts to cover in a sinner's prayer. none the less, he converted in my room with tears in his eyes. haha yeah i was also real happy for him too.
kinda sad lah that he had to leave coz the bus back to city hall was here already. didnt have time to "immunise" him. anyway, called him and a smsed him yesterday to check up on him already. yes, so important to follow up.
we had our altarcall after that. and shirley kinda shared. that was really the time when God spoke to me. when God gave me my own vision. there was this particular worship song which talked about how one day the whole earth would proclaim His name in one mighty name. and what God showed me was not that one day the whole earth singing his praises. or rather, God showed me the situation the world was in right now. it's like He opened my spiritual eyes, He showed me the world through His eyes. wah i tell you my heart literally broke and i broke out in tears. okay lah nothing graphical but still. there's that overwhelming sense of compassion and sorrow. i didnt like it one bit, and im sure God being all so perfect and the creator of this world, wont like it. like duh!
so timely enough. pastor Shirley stopped the worship after that song and shared with us from the bible. a passage that we time and time again had read through, but somehow on that day with God's anointing and wisdom became like a flooding waters into my soul. here's the passage.
"When Jesus had entered Capernaum, a centurion came to him, asking for help. "Lord," he said, "my servant lies at home paralyzed and in terrible suffering." Jesus said to him, "I will go and heal him." The centurion replied, "Lord, I do not deserve to have you come under my roof. But just say the word, and my servant will be healed. For I myself am a man under authority, with soldiers under me. I tell this one, 'Go,' and he goes; and that one, 'Come,' and he comes. I say to my servant, 'Do this,' and he does it." When Jesus heard this, he was astonished and said to those following him, "I tell you the truth, I have not found anyone in Israel with such great faith. I say to you that many will come from the east and the west, and will take their places at the feast with Abraham, Isaac and Jacob in the kingdom of heaven. But the subjects of the kingdom will be thrown outside, into the darkness, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth." Then Jesus said to the centurion, "Go! It will be done just as you believed it would." And his servant was healed at that very hour." - Matthew 8:5-13
ah okay abit lengthy but we neva get sick to hear of God's words! Jesus said He would 'Go'. which also means He would go before us and prepare the way. so dont be afraid in whatever we do alright! God's presence is not only with us, by faith He has already prepared the way for us.
Jesus also mentioned believed. yup i guess this is where its derived that prayer should be accompanied with the believe that it would come true. or else honestly, if we dont believe, wads the point of praying? its like saying something that u dont mean.
okay, not to forget, Jesus was astonished! haha an almighty God that was astonised!? so shirley explained to us why and asked us that so powerful question, "what could u ask from God that would astonish Him?" yup think about it.
we then sang "Here i am" by PlanetShakers, with that question proding in our minds. i know what the answer to that question is on my part. i told God that i would do whatever He needed me to, to come out of my comfort zone or such. i told God that i was willing to be used by Him for His work. in fact, i sorta pleaded to God to use me. haha yes of course u would too. then there's this part of the song,
"I will go where You send me
Jesus take me now I am Yours
I am Yours
Lay my life on the altar
Everything I give to You alone
Here I am
Here I am
Here I am send me"
i was like really praying and crying to God that alright. i was on my knees and crying my heart out, i really mean it. and im gonna do it! haha hold me accountable alright. i know what i have to do. that night i made a promise to God alright. that night i made my prayer, "Here i am, send me."
after that we had JUMP-Answer the Call concert. haha okay we really praised God with all our heart, soul, mind, and voice!! i totally lost my voice at the end of the concert. yeah till now i cant say a proper sentence without straining my throat. haha u know we made so much noise that even the university people there came to the concert, like looking quite amazed.
like last camp we got together on the last night as a CG and shared what we learnt during the camp. haha okay lah, i was really really touched when i heard everyone's sharing that i started tearing again. HAHA okay lah like some big cry baby. no lah i was really touched by God okay, i was like thinking, where else on earth do we get such a wonderful sight, where a bunch of people across ages sit together and really share, correct, and affirm one another without fear or any resentment. what we were sharing wasnt just on the surface, we were sharing deeply, from the heart.
so my turn to share. as i stared sharing, i started crying, again! haha like wad man, every camp there's bound to be tears. i shared what i had learnt. yup indeed i learnt quite abit. but one word which really struck me was. Compassion. we keep using the word, compassion for others. compassion for the lost. but that night God really showed me what that word meant, to Him. i was really compelled to share with the CG what it meant. Compassion for the people out there. haha face it okay, i saw all of your eyes turning red too! haha yeah the power of God. added on and challenged the group to really make full and good use of this Christmas harvest, and bring out the compassion that God has shown us, to the world out there. the love and compassion that God has shown us is really overflowing, and so should be the same for the world out there.
okay i realised that this is really a long long post. gonna end off here. ay all i know is, i cried alot! the june camp, the tears were for myself. this camp the tears were for the world alright. yeah. what im trying to say is, this camp was really a very captivating one. at least now i know what i would have to do. one convert for my side for this camp. its not about the statistics, its not about the numbers, it neva has been. but its more about the souls behind them. its about the compassion that the world needs, you get wad i mean lah.
"Here i am, send me."
